1. |
Estate Sale
03:04
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Estate Sale
For my mother, and hers
After the estate sale
We gave everything away for free
All that you and grandpa ever needed. Mmmm
I went through the closet
Took his flannel and your locket
If the rest can find a new home let it. Mmmm
Strangers rummage so carefully
Don't disturb the newly ghosted
there’s a girl playing hide and seek
with a doll that once belonged to me
I woulda kept it honestly
Her little painted face is
puckered in a kiss
Eternally like this. :* mmm
Maybe she hid from me
She knew two small hands were coming
And when it's time I let them leave mmmm
oh it’s just the stuff we couldn't sell
Pops arm chair went fast
I remember his lap
They took the chair through the door
Like they carried him
Two strong men
You weren't as sudden
Light as porcelain
Now Grandma’s house is only bones
It’s not like we could keep it
All these pieces of pieces
The castle of my childhood. Returns to sand
I wish I could ask you
Where you got that doll
wish I could tell you where she’s goin. Mmmmmm
And I know I’ll see you again
Even if it take too long
all things return where they belong
The wave to the sea, your lips on my cheek. Mmmm
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2. |
Smoked
03:50
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Smoked
you smoked last night in my arms
I said that’s alright babe, girl i was lying
silence fills the space we’re in
I always feel you secondhand
I’m not ready to be honest
Darling, you are all I wanted
So I’m not giving up
I’m not giving up
but if it’s not enough
it’s not enough
I asked for space to free the air
but I’m still gasping and you're not here
You hold the moon in your skin
I’m water waiting to be pulled in
You’re not ready to be honest
but Darling you are all I wanted
so I’m not giving up
I’m not giving up
but if it’s not enough
it’s not enough
Can't force an orbit
No, I Can't force it
Can't force an orbit
No I can’t
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3. |
Farm & Table
03:20
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Farm & Table
I found you below the dew
Where the dirt tastes quiet
And you’ll be out in the sun
For a week or three to dry
When mama says it’s time,
I’ll bring you inside
Braid you up.
Hang you by the stove for luck.
Girl, you’re my farm, you’re my table.
You're my table.
Papa cut the sycamore down
For a half acre of sun
Said nothing grows in shade.
We can’t eat wood
But you only break to make from it
I saw him stacking cords like he was tucking her in
One day we’ll have a hearth
And a great big garden
You’ll be out on your hands and knees
Tending to the heart of it
And when the moon is high
I’ll call you inside
Earthen palms
Kiss me dirty in your arms
Girl you’re farm you’re my table
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4. |
Bad Animal
02:49
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Bad Animal
The day I was born, felt a cord round my neck
a small sanguine body sealed off from breath
And that’s been the running theme ever since
And it’s been bitter. And it’s been bitter
Maybe I am a bad animal
Maybe I am a bad animal
The white winter river left me so ill
A blue veined body sickened with chill
I tried to get warm, but I fell frigid still
And didn’t shiver. It didn’t shiver.
Maybe I am a bad animal
Maybe I am a bad animal
The predator pounces for food and for play
a limp quiet body chosen for prey
Accepting there is no other way
It didn't fight him. It didn't fight.
Maybe I am a bad animal
Maybe I am a bad animal
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5. |
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War Crime
It’s impossible to know
if you’re really gonna grow
Til you grow
And I really cannot say
If I gave my Love a way
Would she stay
The subway looks the same
But you can tell the time by the passersbys
the girls who ride at three
Don't look nothing like me
My mother showed me what she learned
Work for everything you earn
So it’s yours
But seems like everything I own
Was made by hands I’ll never know
It’s a horror
There’s no better place
For existential days than the USA
God can’t recreate
a life like mine without war crime
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6. |
Interstate
04:19
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Interstate
June is your leaving month.
June makes you sad like sundays. So,
you fixed your bicycle
and you’re pushing off today. You said,
“If I get tired before Chicago
I can always take the train.” Well, I’d
never talk you out of leaving
But I was hoping you would stay
When the white rooster crows
and you’re feeling alone
When you got nothing but road
and cold collarbones
No matter how far you go
You can always come home
always come home
I see your restlessness
You know I’m scared of losing, but
a tree cannot expect
The breeze to lay down and sleep, so
when you call me from Chicago
I’ll tell you I’ve been moving too, see I
Made my way to the Atlantic
So I could feel the wind with you
When the white ocean glows
and I'm feeling alone
When I’ve got nothing but stones
and cold collarbones
No matter how far I go
you will always be home
I’ll return
Come May we’ll both return to Albany
As two different people
I don’t know them yet
But you’re pushing off today.
Ooooh
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7. |
Altar
04:52
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Altar
She comes to my altar, lays her hands on me
incense on her hair, small blessings
O my soul, O my soul
O my soul, O my O
She’s breath and bone, divinity and dust
And we are sanctuaries, all of us
Her wine tongue worships my holy fire
Anoint me baby, amount me harder
O my soul, O my soul
O my soul, O my O
O my soul, O my soul
O my soul, O my O
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8. |
Etta
03:39
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Etta
I fall for you day by day
etta james on the fire escape
i i i i do
the night we met I remembered you
I wondered if you could feel it too
i i i i do
fall fall fall for you
these melodies are ancient
the poets mourn there’s nothing new
but don’t you see the beauty
in doing what you’re born to do
a thou thou thousand times before
And needing more
i i i i do
I—-- do
Once upon a moon so high
I fixed your carriage you poured my wine
And I i i i knew
As the mountain holds the stream
our bodies carry memory
i i i i do
fall fall fall for you
These melodies grow deeper
The poets circle round anew
She sent me to the ether
to come back to loving you
a thou thou thousand times before
And I need more
i i i i do
I—-- do
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9. |
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He was Supposed to Come with Me
The house was emptied
(He was supposed to come with me)
I packed up his toys and treats
the night he went missing.
Got him as a baby
A fluffy black and white kitty
I named him Little and he loved me
And once I threw him a party
Grief scoops you clean
no matter who you’re grieving
Love ain't unique
known felt held touched
It's supposed to add up
flight of white dove
where are you going without me
I got a call from the police
(He was supposed to come with me)
In a bag in the backseat
(He was supposed to come with me)
known felt held touched
It's supposed to add up
flight of white dove
where are you going
We buried him in the morning
(He was supposed to come with me)
We left the land and his body
(He was supposed to come with me)
known felt held touched
It's supposed to add up
flight of white dove
where are you going (without me)
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10. |
Cantor
04:28
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Cantor
Is it a sin if I only go to Mass to hear the choir sing
and scratch poetry into the pews to block out the homily
Also I’m sleeping with the cantor
He sang, “Pray with me” and I did
Oooooh Oooooh
Is it strange that anyone I fall in love with moves away
something about the distance gives me room to trip I guess
He said he wants to move to England
Well, I told him that he should
he said maybe somewhere by the sea
i said i’ve heard it’s nice on brighton beach
Oooooh Oooh
Is it weird that my ex from college now lives here
and asked that girl to marry him
and i’m a little scared of them
seeing me singin at the farmers market
i wonder if his dog remembers me
that might be nice to see, actually
lost my virginity on Brighton Beach
he lost nothing
Oooh ooooh Ooohhh
Is it crazy to wake up on Sunday in his bed
I meant to walk to the cathedral
He had to work and look I get it
still being left feels pathetic
Would it be wild to admit i’ve thought about the smile
He hand me just for nothing
or how i think it means i love him
christ he’s earnest and oh so sweet
he makes me sad when he sing sing sings
Ooooh Oooooh
Let us pray to the Lord, Lord hear our prayer
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Girl Love Albany, New York
Girl Love is the indie folk project of Laura Beth Johnson produced by Hannah and Marc LeGrand.
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